Mike Parsons
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Video Summary:
When it comes to knowing our true identity, it’s not about copying others or climbing some spiritual ladder—it’s about hearing God for ourselves. We’re not trying to fit into a religious mould or follow someone else’s journey; we’re learning to rest, to trust, and to grow in relationship. It’s not about striving or earning, but about realising we’re already included, already loved, already free. God never meant us to stay stuck in old ways of thinking or be limited by what others say about us. He wants to reveal who we really are through direct, personal relationship—and that’s something no one else can define for us.
A lot of the time, we’ve been taught to see ourselves through filters—through what others expect, or what religion tells us is acceptable—but God wants to strip all that back and show us who we truly are. It’s a process, often uncomfortable, but always leading to freedom. As we begin to engage Him more deeply, we stop needing external affirmation, because we’re hearing His voice. We learn to let go of the fear of getting it wrong, and instead walk confidently as sons and daughters who already belong. We don’t need to strive to become what we already are—we just need to live in the reality of it and let God continue the transformation.
The more we get to know God, the more we realise how much better He is than we ever imagined, and that makes the journey exciting. Everyone’s story is different, and I love hearing them because together they show the richness of God’s work in us. I never planned any of what’s happened in my life, but step by step, God led me beyond what I thought possible. It’s not about comparison with others—it’s about becoming fully ourselves, embracing who God made us to be. That’s where rest and joy come from, not striving. And as we live in that identity, we naturally bless others. We become rivers of living water, refreshing the people around us, not by trying to be anyone else, but by being exactly who we are in Him.
Mike’s latest book, Unconditional Love, is out now as an ebook on our website and will soon be available to order in paperback from your local or online bookseller.
More details at eg.freedomarc.org/books
Lightly edited full transcript:
Walking with God | Authentic Relationship
I think when it comes to the relationship side of it, he’s on his own journey. So really, it’s about encouragement. If there’s an opportunity to practise something with him, then do something simple—like going to the throne of grace with a problem, or something basic that helps him engage with God on the inside. Where is God? Because a lot of people have never really considered the reality of that. They might say, “Well, yes, God is in me, the Holy Spirit is in me,” but where exactly? And how do we relate to that? How do you engage with that in any real sense? Rather than just saying, “Well, he’s there. I know the Holy Spirit is in me,” actually exploring where and how that works with our spirit and soul, and how that brings life.
You can also open up some other ideas—like Psalm 23, lying down in green pastures. Well, that could be the garden of your heart. There’s a scripture that says the heart is like a well-watered garden, so you can point towards both that inner relationship and the development of personal intimacy. But also you can say, we have access to be seated with God in heavenly places where Christ is. We can be seated there, which means a position of identity and authority. But also, intimacy—being with the Father, just as Jesus is with the Father, so are we.
So I think there are those two aspects you can begin to help someone engage with, if they’re on a journey—which obviously your son is, as he’s discovering things and having realisations. There still aren’t too many people who’ve put all of these elements together into one consistent whole. You know, Don [Keathley] has done the kingdom, the now, and the eschatology, but perhaps hasn’t quite touched on the intimacy and heavenly encounter aspects yet—or maybe he has and just hasn’t shared that. Who knows? But I imagine he’s on that journey, and the Father will be opening that door for him. That’s when it moves beyond just a theological belief system to a relational belief system—one that reveals the true nature of God.
Ultimately, I know he’s very much into love and the reality that God’s nature is love. I doubt that’s just a theory for him—I think it’s his experience. God’s got him on his own personal journey of experience. And I’d say, start with love. God is love—so how does he experience God as love? What does that mean? The unconditional nature of love can begin to deal with the religious obligations and duties that may have come from earlier experiences. Unconditional love brings a revelation of God that shows just how good he is—how kind, tolerant, patient and wonderful he is.
So help him experience unconditional love with very simple things—like closing his eyes, being still and knowing God. Be still and know love. Let love touch him. These small things can be really helpful for little breakthroughs, which then become a taste of something deeper, something that can lead further into the fullness of God revealing himself. And then your son can come to know who he is in God—free from any of the religious baggage we’ve all had to work through.
It’s the little things really. You want someone to always want more, rather than feeling overwhelmed. Like after a big meal when you feel so full it’s uncomfortable—you don’t want that spiritually. It’s tempting to give someone too much, but it’s better to offer just enough so they’re still hungry, still curious. Rather than thinking, “This might be my only or best opportunity, so I’m going to give them the whole lot,” it’s better to go bit by bit.
The idea of a “joy economy” speaks to me of how heaven functions—not based on duty, obligation or even money as we know it, but on joy. Having joy in something is worth more than the kind of economy that’s all about profit. Enjoying your work is better than just working to live. That phrase has all sorts of connotations. In an economic sense, if you’re serving someone in what you’re doing—whether that’s in a job or your own business—what’s your motive? Do you want someone to be blessed, to be happy receiving your product or service? That changes everything. The joy economy has a different motive behind it.
More broadly, God wants us to live with an attitude of thanksgiving and gratitude—which is joyful. Rejoice always, and again I say, rejoice. You can’t rejoice if you’re miserable and focused on what you don’t have. You rejoice over what you do have—what God has done, what Jesus did, your experiences, your testimony. That focus on the positive opens up even more in the future. Whereas the joy economy would not be based on warfare—there’s no joy in war. We don’t want to be at war with anything or anyone. That fits with a restorative view: I’m not going to fight against something, I’m going to restore—whether that’s a relationship or a person. Restoration, not opposition.
The Freedom of Sonship
So there are lots of different ways of looking at it, but joy is the predominant factor. Whether you’re thinking in financial terms or in terms of how things work, joy is foundational. And I’d say love, joy and peace all work together—they cement the whole thing. Then from that comes grace and mercy. The joy economy is living in limitless grace, triumphant mercy and unconditional love. These are aspects that deepen and broaden what joy really is.
If I don’t know I’m unconditionally loved, it’s very difficult to be truly joyful, because there’ll always be a condition I feel I have to meet—and I might fail. So unconditional love leads to joy, and joy leads to peace. And peace really comes when you’re at rest—when you’re not striving or struggling or constantly trying to tick boxes. It’s that place of rest, where you’re living in what God’s already done and who he already is towards us.
That can then start to shape the way we live—how we live in this world and how we stay peaceful even in hard times. Rejoicing, praising, being thankful—not just when life is wonderful on the surface, but also in the midst of difficulty. People often look at the world and feel despair—“It’s getting worse and worse.” But I look at the world and yes, I see what’s going on—but I also know the kingdom of God is filling the Earth. I believe God will restore everything eventually. So I’m not focused on how it is now—I’m focused on what it will be like when it’s restored, when the kingdom is functioning on Earth as it is in heaven.
It’s easy to become despondent when you focus on the negative, but I try to focus on God’s intention—his future. So what’s happening now is only temporary. I’m not going to let something temporary weigh me down or cloud my perspective. Yes, it might be a fact right now, but the truth is that everything will be restored to God’s original design, however long it takes. And while I’m here, I’m going to enjoy life and live in that truth.
To me, the economy of joy is how I live. It’s how I rejoice in things and stay thankful. I look out the window and the sun’s shining—I rejoice in that. It’s beautiful. Maybe I can’t be out there right now, but I rejoice that others are enjoying it—the garden, the wildlife, the birds feeding on the table—they’re enjoying it, and I rejoice in that too. Creation seems to be smiling.
And if it’s rainy one day—well, I’m inside, so that’s great. I can be thankful the rain is watering the earth, preparing the plants for spring. You can always choose to see something positive. For me, my attitude of joy is this: the glass is half full and getting fuller—or already overflowing. Rather than focusing on the negative. A lot of what we’ve been taught tends to focus on the negative—the enemy, the fight, the battle.
I’m not interested in the enemy or what he’s doing. Because of that, he generally leaves me alone. By and large, the enemy doesn’t want to mess with me—because I’d look to restore things, even for him. So from that perspective, I’m not coming from a place of focusing on warfare or negativity. I’m coming from a position of, this is where I’m seated, this is who I am. Everything is under my feet.
So, I ask, What is God’s intention in this situation? And I can rejoice in that, because I know God’s purpose is always to bring good out of it. I want to be part of that. I believe we have a mandate to live in joy and to be joyful. It’s not just a nice idea—Jesus said, My joy is in you so your joy can be full. That sounds like a mandate to me.
He also said, My peace I leave with you—not as the world gives. That kind of peace goes beyond understanding. Again, that feels like a mandate: live in peace. And then, Love one another as I have loved you—that’s not just a suggestion, that’s a commandment. It’s a new one. But in essence, the real commandment is: Let Me love you, so you can love others. That’s a mandate too.
God wants us to live in love, joy, peace and rest. And from that place of rest, everything else begins to flow. A group could absolutely have a corporate mandate to steward or administrate a “joy economy”—to live it out personally and also see how it might impact the world around them.
The medical profession is increasingly recognising the effects of gratitude and joy on the body and mind. It brings a sense of wholeness. It even boosts the immune system when we live in a state of thankfulness and joy, rather than under a cloud of doom, gloom and misery. Life is meant to be enjoyed, not endured.
Sure, we can look at the world and say, “It’s a mess,” but that doesn’t mean it has to stay that way—and it doesn’t mean we have to be affected by it. I believe the world does need to awaken, and the Church especially needs to awaken—big time—to joy. Too often it gets bogged down in negativity.
But the truth is, God is always working, always processing, always good. He’s always wanting to bring good out of every situation. And we get to cooperate with Him in that. Yes, sometimes we see things that we want to change, and it’s okay to bring those to God. We can work with Him on it. We can wrestle with Him. But at the end of the day, we trust Him. We trust that what He’s doing will ultimately work out for the best.
Sometimes we have to refocus our attention and actively engage God in the things we want to see change. God doesn’t want us to be passive. He wants us to be real, to share our hearts, to express our desires. We don’t have to pretend everything’s fine when it’s not. There’s a difference between wrestling with God and accusing Him. Wrestling says, “This is what I long for—this is my heart.” And then we rest in His goodness, trusting that His way will prevail.
So yes, we can wrestle—but not to force our own way. We wrestle so that God’s way can be released into our situations.
With your son—it’s been a long journey. You’ve seen things along the way. And you’re not giving up. I remember you saying he told you Jesus had agreed to his calling—and laughed, saying, “So did you.” That just made me smile.
It’s tough when you’ve got years of memories and patterns, but the small shifts and signs of progress are encouraging. They help you persevere. They remind you to be consistent. Ultimately, it’s about relying on the grace, mercy, love and goodness of God—for you, your son, your whole family.
And yes, it’s absolutely fine to remind God of His promises. He said them in the first place. You’re just reminding Him of who He is. That gives us confidence. We come boldly before the throne of grace. We don’t have to tiptoe. We can come with confidence because we know God is good.
When it comes to entering into the fullness of all God has for us, seeing ourselves the way God sees us is key. We have to come into agreement with God—aligning our minds and hearts with His. His thoughts about us are vast and loving. If our thoughts contradict His, it becomes difficult to receive and accept the wonder of who we are in His eyes.
So God wants us to step into the fullness of our relationship with Him—through intimacy, through the revelation of how He sees us, and how that reveals our true identity. If He loves me unconditionally but I don’t love myself the same way, then something’s out of alignment. And that causes problems.
Many people struggle with identity. They don’t see themselves the way God does. So we’re faced with a choice: do I believe what others have said about me? Do I believe what my past says? Or do I believe what God says?
Scripture says, Love one another as you love yourself. So if you don’t know how to love yourself, how can you love others properly? Loving yourself doesn’t mean being selfish. It means seeing yourself as God sees you. You are the righteousness of God in Christ. That’s the truth. And when you really believe that—when you stop striving and start accepting—it becomes your experience, your reality.
Knowing your identity also means facing what’s shaped your identity up to now. If your past contradicts what God says about you, you have to be willing to deal with that. Don’t ignore it or deny it. Face it with honesty.
You can say, “Father, I struggle to believe what You say because this has happened to me.” Maybe it’s rejection. Maybe people let you down. And then the Father says, “I’ve never rejected you—I accept you.” And then the choice is, do I forgive those who rejected me? Do I let God heal me?
Because emotional damage can make it hard to receive love, especially the kind God offers. But healing comes when you forgive those who hurt you and release them. Most people aren’t capable of loving you the way God does—because they’re not God. And that’s okay. But you can still choose to forgive.
If you try to build self-esteem from your own efforts—your works, your successes—then failure will knock you down hard. But if your worth comes from God, which is unchanging and unconditional, then even when you fall short, you’re still secure. It must come from God—that’s where the truth is, the Way, the Truth and the Life; that’s where love is, He is love. Ultimately that’s the key. It must come from Him.
Living Beyond Limits | Identity and Intimacy
It may not always be easy to accept that, but the more and more we get to know God, the easier it becomes to accept—because we realise he’s better than we could have ever imagined or thought. And it’s good to hear that. It’s just good to hear different people’s experiences. It’s good to share the journey with others. I love these sessions because I’m always meeting new people—people with different pasts, different identities—but they’re all sons of God. And within that, God’s relationship with each one is unique and wonderful.
We can celebrate and rejoice in the diversity of our lives and our journeys, and the fact that they can connect with others. I can’t relate to everyone, but someone else can—and that’s why it’s so important we all share our journeys and experiences together. It’s encouraging—yes, we’re encouraging each other in recognising that God is at work in all of us, in different ways. And that gives hope to everyone.
God just seems to go beyond anything you can imagine or think. That, to me, is such a great truth—God is always beyond what you can imagine or think. And that’s why I find it exciting. For me, every day is a day to learn something new, to experience something more. Every day is a good day—because God is so good.
When I think about the limitations of what I could ask or imagine, and then compare that to how good God wants things to be—I can ask for a lot, and I can think pretty big—but I’ll never exceed who God is. And it’s a wonderful thing to know that God will go beyond my limitations—about myself or about my life.
I look back at what’s happened and I think, “I never saw that coming.” I’d have never thought I’d end up doing the things I’ve done. It wasn’t on my agenda. It’s not like I had a life plan where I knew exactly how things would work. It was always just one step at a time—getting to know God, hearing from him, and actually believing some of the things he was showing me.
And a lot of the time, I didn’t even know how to think like that. I would never have imagined myself doing what I’m doing now. When I was working in a hospital—specifically, in a hospital lab—I would never have imagined that I’d go on to plant churches, that I’d be connecting with people all over the world, teaching, helping and encouraging. But God knew. And he led me, step by step.
Where I see limitations, God sees beyond. When I think, “How am I supposed to do that?” he already knows I can—if I’m willing to keep walking the journey. And even when things don’t go to plan—when they go wrong or don’t turn out the way I intended—I know God is good, and he wants to bring something better out of it. Even that is beyond what I can see in the moment. Because God is so much better, so much bigger, and has greater expectations than I do.
If I’d asked for what I thought would make me happy, I’d have asked for far less than what I’ve actually received in my life. So from that perspective, God really is so good. And the journey has been full of blessings—some of them unexpected, some of them way beyond what I could have imagined or thought. Because he’s able to do exceedingly, abundantly, above all that we could ask or think.
That fills my future with optimism. Whatever comes, God is bigger and more than able to handle it. And I know his goodness, grace and mercy are limitless and overflowing. His love is unconditional—and for me, that makes all the difference.
When God said to me, “beyond beyond,” I didn’t know what he meant. I had no idea. I could’ve tried to reason it out—“beyond beyond,” what does that even mean? But with God, it’s always beyond beyond. It’s beyond my wildest dreams, beyond my imagination, beyond my experiences, beyond anywhere I’ve ever been before. God himself is beyond anything I can imagine, think, reason or understand. He always goes beyond where I would put a limitation.
I ask myself, “Where else could this possibly lead?”—and there’s always a beyond.
In the past, our security and foundation were probably rooted in doctrine—those things we were certain of, that gave us identity, reputation, or a sense of how people viewed us. But once we start engaging God and seeing how he sees us, those things no longer matter. Paul called them rubbish—refuse, dung. Whether you call it a hill of beans or anything else—it’s all the same: none of it compares to the intimacy of knowing God and his love, and discovering who we really are.
And then it’s about living that out—becoming who we truly are. It’s great when people can point the way or encourage us—people who say, “Hey, there’s more.” People who share testimonies, or go ahead as forerunners and say, “There’s something over here.” Explorers who discover a new realm and invite others into it. That’s great—but then you become that to someone else.
That’s the reality. You know way more people than I do—you have your own circle, your own connections. I don’t know them. But you do. And God can open something up for you to be a forerunner in their lives. Your experiences then become a source of encouragement and inspiration for them.
That’s really what it comes down to. I’ve been blessed—and I’ve been blessed by others who’ve encouraged me, shared their journey, supported me. And I want to be a blessing in return. But you can only bless others if you yourself have been blessed.
I think God wants us to be blessed in the fullest sense—to be empowered to succeed and thrive in who we are, so that who we are becomes a blessing to someone else. I only need to be me. You only need to be you. You don’t have to be me—and thank God for that! That’s where comparison falls away. You can look at what I’ve taught and be encouraged, but you don’t have to be me. You can’t be me—you’re not me.
Some people try to be like someone else, but God just wants you to be you. And I think that’s the mark of someone who’s really discovered their identity—they’re not pointing people to themselves, but pointing them back to the source in their life: God. He’s the one who helps you become the best version of you. And that is what will bless others.
I can’t bless someone else by trying to be like Justin [Justin Paul Abraham]. I’m not Justin. I love Justin—I love who he is, and what he brings. He adds a flavour to the bigger picture that I never could—because I’m not like that. But I can be me. And I’ll be able to help people who maybe need something slightly different. And people can learn from both of us—because there’s no comparison. I don’t have to be like him, and he doesn’t have to be like me.
I can be content in who I am and rejoice in who he is. I can celebrate people’s differences—because it means I don’t have to be that way. Trying to be someone else is hard work! It really is. But God doesn’t want us striving—he wants us at rest. And real rest comes when we’re living in the truth of who we are, in that relationship with God.
So, we rejoice in it. We enjoy it. We go back to that joy economy we started with—this life is meant to be enjoyed. And I’ll never enjoy it if I’m trying to be someone else. But when I truly accept who he made me to be, and I live in that, that’s when my true identity shines through. And that identity only comes out of who I am in him.
So intimacy and relationship—that’s all I need. But it’s not selfish. It’s not self-centred. It’s always about being a blessing. That’s the key. If something isn’t flowing through me, then it’s stagnating in me. And stagnant water? Well, the only thing that likes that is mosquitoes!
I need rivers of living water flowing from my innermost being—so that I become a refreshment to others, and others can refresh me too. When we really celebrate each other, we learn from so many different sources. But ultimately, God is the source. He is the way. He is the Tree of Life.
That’s the key.
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All Mike’s books, including Unconditional Love, are available to order from online and local booksellers; or you can buy them as ebooks and download them instantly from our website.
Unconditional Love – new book out now
Sons of Issachar 